Step 10 is the maintenance step. The work of Steps 4 through 9 cleaned up the past. Step 10 keeps us current. We take inventory daily — not as punishment, but as honest accounting. We look at where we were selfish, dishonest, frightened, or resentful. We look at where we were wrong. And when we find it, we admit it promptly — to ourselves, and to the person we affected, as quickly as possible. The goal is to avoid letting new wreckage pile up while the old is cleared away.

We get stuck when the inventory becomes harsh self-criticism rather than honest self-examination. We also get stuck when we only inventory what went wrong and forget to notice what went right — gratitude and honesty belong in the same daily accounting. And we get stuck on 'promptly.' The longer we wait to admit we were wrong, the harder it becomes. The discomfort of sitting with unaddressed wrongs is what we used to drink and use over.

Step 10 looks like five minutes at the end of the day. It looks like a simple set of questions we ask ourselves honestly. Where was I resentful today? Where was I dishonest? Where was I afraid? Where was I selfish? And then: where was I of service? Where did I show up? It also looks like pausing in the middle of an argument to say 'I was wrong about that' before the day is over.